It was gonna be a fun datenight, our babysitter had arrived, Billy was almost home... A new restaurant and movie was on the agenda. As I went back to my room to get changed I started experiencing some of the worst intense pains I've ever felt. Broken nose, torn acl, pitoscin induced contractions... You name it, this was worse. I was literally sweating the pain was so bad. Billy got home and I quickly told him I didn't think we were going out tonight. I had similar pains the week before but they subsided after a few hours and weren't as intense. I called an after hours nurse and she was more concerned about some spotting I had the week earlier and suggested we go in. I almost didn't go. I wasn't a baby... I know pregnancy can bring discomforts.
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| Waiting in the ER before we knew what was going on. |
To make a long story short... It was confirmed that our little extra heartbeat just wasn't growing in the right place and that now my life was in jeopardy. Six hours after laying in my bed I was having emergency surgery for an ectopic pregnancy. They thought my tube was close to rupturing due to fluid that had started to accumulate. I've never been in a situation where surgery was immediate. They've always been scheduled and planned. You don't have much time to think or to even wrap your mind around what all is happening. But you do start thinking about the 'what ifs'... We laugh about it now but I did have some pretty big requirements for Billy if things had taken a turn for the worse. Not anything to do with me but for him and our girls. I think he thinks the pain killers had started kicking in... only I can answer that. :-)
The next day was pure exhaustion. After being up for 24 hours and adding a surgery in there, we are thankful for those that came to our rescue. I don't think the reality of it even hit us until Saturday. We have so many questions for our doctor. We are definitely still healing; physically and emotionally. And we are looking forward to some one-on-one time soon to really support one another.
But above all else, we are so thankful. Thankful that God urged us to the hospital. I really didn't feel the nurse' recommendation was warranted, my problem wasn't the spotting it was the pain. Even after the pain subsided, we almost left the ER to get on with our dwindling date night. God confirmed how badly I needed to be seen by bringing back the pains. Thank you God. He gave me a female ER doctor who had been through this before and had even ruptured to share her experience. Thank you God. God gave me confidence in the surgery by giving me a doctor I had met before and who knew and worked with my Obgyn. And then confirmed it even more by giving me a surgical nurse who used the same doctor as her own Ob. Thank you God. And most importantly, God had people already lined up for caring for our two little girls so we could focus on this. I can't imagine what would have happened had I been home alone with the girls and I had ruptured. Thank you God for your perfect timing. And thank you God for another day to be a wife and mother to Billy and the girls. And I could take this even further to being a daughter, sister, cousin, friend etc.
Yes, the outcome is not what we would choose. This path is not the one we would have wanted to go, but we know He is in control. How can I doubt His planning when He has shown how easily He can guide us even during the hard times. I pray that I honor Him during this time. Give all the glory to Him. Trust in the path He has chosen for us and live to share His name.
We will meet our little Angel again one day.
Brought tears to my eyes...so thankful for God's hand of protection in your life.
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